In 2027, a previously unknown manuscript by Sappho is unearthed that clarifies her poems were addressed exclusively to heterosexual Greek men with a “sissy” fetish. The ensuing Discourse Wars all but end civilization by the 30s.
Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve uncovered the shocking truth, and I have to tell you about it right now! Tumblr, that bastion of degeneracy, they used to be all about yaoi – everywhere you looked, yaoi this, yaoi that, everything was dudes kissing. But now, it’s all yuri! Everything is yuri! Yuri as far as the eye can see! And do you know why this is happening? It’s because of the plastics in the water! That’s right, folks, the globalists have been poisoning our water supply with plastics, and it’s turning our precious internet culture upside down!
Tumblr is rotting my brain a bit, though. Like I saw a shopping cart alone by itself in the parking lot in the middle of a snowstorm and thought “oh, that’s yuri”
I then took the shopping cart into the store with me and felt a warm little glow.
