Dude, who even knows.
Post reblogged from Kontextmaschine with 70 notes
So anyway, my sense now (since Covid went “long” in my brain, destroyed my personality, and left me to form a new one, from perspective of which I realized the old one had been well-“masked” autistic) is that autism is a matter of the personality constructing itself such that it has no role for pre-rational, pre-human “animal instinct”, and thus must do everything (including further self-construction) by conscious logic alone
(Like, I don’t know how social species without language would organize themselves if they couldn’t parse each others’ feelings directly, and we come from a long line of such species)
This also means that autism and sexuality (the old personality was heterosexual, this one’s bi) aren’t set at birth (and thus conceivably might be externally influencable), but are set prerationally and aren’t consciously (or possibly at all) changeable within an established personality
Also another insight I’ve picked up is the reason for all the transbians and manly-men late-life transitioners and yaoi fujoshi turned trans men is it’s absolutely a Kinsey 0 thing, it’s not so much autogyne/androphilia as a fetish as you only see value in the opposite from your birth sex yet you want to see value in yourself
Since I’ve been bi I’ve absolutely had “gender euphoria” about inhabiting a male body like I didn’t before, and it makes me realize this is what I wanted identifying as a girl (a lesbian, even!) in adolescence in the 90s. If there was some treatment available that made you bi honestly I’d recommend that over gender transition but there isn’t.
Post with 11 notes
In one more bit of “our revealed preferences as seen in sexual media indie erotica trends are probably a better guide to the actual cultural shifts going on than our publicly proclaimed ideologies”:
I am starting to see more and more FtM “fuck me like a girl” posts in the erotica and roleplay subreddits and the gonewilds, especially the “plz degrade me” ones, because it’s framed as misgendering as degradation
And a lot of times, kink fetishization seems to be how people reconcile their worldviews with the exact things they most don’t want but nonetheless must admit exist in the world. So I’m not saying they really want to be seen as women, might be a sign of the exact opposite.*
And yet, in the cis, hetero world there already exists a kink about men having their maleness denied, being proclaimed worthlessly female as a humiliation, being treated and fucked as women, being gaslit and manipulated into seeing themselves as women.
It is called “sissification”, and interestingly this FtM “misgender me with your dick” stuff doesn’t seem to draw on or be aware of it at all, and it doesn’t even seem to have convergently evolved to fetishize the same angles of it. If anything, it seems to combine hetero Fsub “use and degrade me irrespective of my wishes” tropes with gay male yaoi seme/uke dynamics.
And I look back to last year when someone was like “all these FtM bandwagoners, they’re really just fujoshi fangirls, y’know”, and I who had no sense there even was a trend to bandwagon was like “no I didn’t, what?”
And now I’m like “hm”.
* though I mean, if you’re offering yourself up on r/Misogynyfetish, you are asserting that degrading you constitutes “misogyny”, so, hm.