One interesting thing around Portland these days is no form of personal motorized transport below the Vespa level – this includes underbones, 2-stroke motorcycles, dirt bikes, mini bikes, pedal bikes, rental scooters, e-bikes, and I suppose Segways – has established a norm around not using them drunk.

Wait, no, I bet those guys who go down the street standing with like one wheel between their feet do, they at least wear helmets.