Kontextmaschine

17th February 2021

Post reblogged from David J Prokopetz with 2,188 notes

falconier:
prokopetz:
Concept: comedy one-shot RPG where all of the player characters are members of a Royal Guard unit that’s found itself serving as the last line of defence against some existential threat, like a plague of zombie dragons or whatever, except none of them know how to fight because the King is a big weirdo who likes to play dress-up dolls with real people, with their unit being established specifically for that purpose. The Royal Guard’s membership was selected entirely for their looks, and they were never given any real combat training or practical equipment. All they have to fall back on are their faintly absurd uniforms, an arsenal of fanciful weapons that look awesome on paper but are as likely to maim the wielder as the target in practice*, and whatever oddball non-combat skills they happen to have picked up in the course of playing soldier.
* To anticipate the obvious question, yes, there are gunswords. They’re so front-heavy that they’re impossible to aim beyond point-blank range and reloading them is a process that takes hours and requires partial disassembly by a qualified gunsmith, but they are, in fact, genuine gunswords.
You’re describing this as a comedy RPG, but I’m pretty sure it’s a horror RPG. A bunch of unprepared, unsuspecting protagonists thrown into a hideously dangerous situation? An antagonist with every advantage well-situated to pick them off? Equipment that LOOKS like it might be their salvation but actually exposes them to even more danger? Incompetent authorities more likely to abandon them to death than help them out? Sounds like horror to me.
Comedy is just horror but slightly to the left.

It’s like Early Modern Paranoia