me: and so i feel like, as a person, i present myself as this fun, optimistic, adventurous self, when in reality, beneath that surface, I have a lot of anger, fear, and bitterness. i worry that people step into me like a shallow stream, looking for fun, a refresher, beautiful scenery, but too quickly they get sucked into my depths, and it's ugly, terrifying undercut banks, and my emotions and needs will drown them.

so that's why I think I'm actually so afraid of th-

My therapist: hold on are you once again talking about the fucking Bolto-

Me: the Bolton Strid, yes-